Mia and Ty. From oblivion to obvious

It’s such a joy to have them with me. There ain’t words to describe my love for them. They are an integral part of my Journey. They are an extension of me and my life :-).
We are spending a weekend at a friend’s house..more like a mansion. You feel the luxury as you step inside the beautiful hub. I’m not one to look at people’s luxuries, or material things but like most humans do, I couldn’t help but stare in awe…It’s called human nature.



To see Tyler initially having a fit for getting a bit wet, to not wanting to get out of the water at all is…MasterCard…priceless 🙂 ! He is so adorable with his round face, red cheeks and big head fulla brains. He is such a clever, intelligent boy. He scrunches up his face every time I ask “silly” questions. And with patience like an old soul, he would answer me with so much concentration and agitation at the same time. He’s such a sport!
Listening to him explaining and exclaiming, it’s hard to believe he’s an offspring of drug addict parents. He is unbelievably intelligent, which is normally not what happens with children being born from drug addicts. They always have some sort of – not disability, per se – too much of a strong analogy, but rather a few short comings eg: lack of concentration, stunt hair growth, speech problem but to mention a few.
But I don’t see it in Tyler, he’s like a tiny professor, with a fiercely enquiring mind, always pointing and asking about stuff.
What amazes me is how he describes something. When he first saw the expansive, plush toilet, he said ” nanna it’s billiant” (he still struggles with pronouncing R)
What made him think it was brilliant and not beautiful? Was it the way the light goes on when you enter the toilet, or the censored taps or the slight heated floors…
How could he distinguish between what is beautiful and what is brilliant..?
How come he had this amazing ability to reason like that seemingly he was literally a drug addict himself. The first few days of his life he spent wailing of pain, whilst the medical staff weaned him off his addiction, trying to ease him into reality and away from oblivion. An addict not by choice, but by the choices made by others.
The ones who should have nurtured him, was the same ones that made selfish and stupid choices.


I remember looking at her in the first few hours of her life, almost every bodily crevice plugged with a pipe, pumping life into her. She too was high and in pain and desperately fighting to stay alive.
I’ve seen that picture before a few years ago and that of her older brother. He unfortunately didn’t have any fight to live. I remember keeping him whilst he gave his last breath and then handing him over to his mother, the same nurturer..
She survived and refused to give up or give into the force bigger than man, the very thing that are destroying so many lives, the cancer that spreads at rapid pace and that there are no cure for. The only power that is bigger than this epidemic is the mind itself.
Tamia was very agitated as a baby. I used to bath her, make her bottles and tried to get her to sleep but most times it was in vain. She refused to be pacified and desperately tried to stay awake. Another side effect of drug abuse, no rest for the wicked.
At one stage her mouth was covered with ulcers, diarrhea and a badly inflamed buttocks. I have never felt so hopeless in my life, seeing how painful it was for her to swallow knowing she is busy starving.
At the same time water was running from her stomach and she was losing essential salts.
I picked up my bag and hurried to the chemist, trying not to burst into tears knowing that this was knowingly inflicted. Thus of her nurturer..
I hurried back with a bag full of medicine, new bottles, bottle scrubber with disinfectant and immediately began to slowly administer the medication at regular hourly intervals, hoping and praying that the medication works so that we can start giving her some formula so that she gets some nourishment. It felt like forever before she greedily sucked and swallowed the formula.


Today she is a handful five year old ready to embark on her educational journey. She unfortunately carries more developmental scars than her brother. Her hair doesn’t grow at a pace it should, she has an obvious speech problem and we seem to think she struggles with keeping focus. The ultimate challenge will become obvious when she starts grade R next year.

That’s their story and believe me, a very short version. They are so blessed. They have two mommies, a grandmother and an aunt that will give them anything she can.


Unconditional Love 🙂


2 thoughts on “Mia and Ty. From oblivion to obvious

  1. sinsofamother January 5, 2016 / 8:43 am

    Although I know the story reading it makes me cry…they are blessed to have you guys in their lives…


  2. 212design January 14, 2016 / 8:48 pm

    Knowing you makes me know them…Reading this makes me feel every ounce of pain, joy, compassion & love you feel for these beautiful souls. A creation brought into the lives of many for reasons we do not know.May their purpose in life far exceed our expectation. They are destined for greatness!

    Liked by 1 person

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